Thursday, May 9, 2013

So right that everything is wrong.

My first inkling that things had changed came at the Detroit airport. The young man sat down besides me in the crowded waiting lounge.
He wore an Arsenal scarf. Good lad.
I asked him where he got it and he said he was just back from covering the riots in London for a Communist newspaper.
Too cool. I had the opportunity to talk to a real live Red and an Arsenal fan to boot. We had a great time talking about the Presidential campaigns and the decline and fall of Western civilization. It was about the time we were discussing the balkanization of U.S. politics that I looked around the crowded lobby and was alarmed at the distressed expressions on the faces of those folks sitting around us. I smiled at the woman sitting next to me and she recoiled like my hair was on fire. I turned back to my young commie friend and he smiled at my confusion and said " you get used to it...that and don't talk so loud in a crowd."
 I reckon folks get spooked when you get off the 1st amendment's well worn acceptable paths and wander around the plains of free thinking.
I suddenly felt like Natalie Maines surrounded by pissed off country fans. Poor gal says an unpopular opinion (which over time turned out to be pretty damn well embraced) and her career is over.
I thought artists were supposed to challenge how and what we think.
Not so much anymore ever since Fox and Conservatives have made an industry out of beating the shit out of liberals and anyone who questions the right.
'Twas not always so.
I was screwing around on YouTube and found the song "The Universal Soldier" by Buffy St. Marie. Wow! Now there is a song that questions the root of war to a very uncomfortable level. Personal responsibility. Each and every soldier.
 An artist would be crucified way beyond a boycott if they made this song today. But then I messed around some more and found a version of this song performed by Glenn Campbell on Shindig. Radical pacifism on primetime TV.
A little more surfing and I found Johnny Cash and Buffy St. Marie performing "Custer don't ride so good anymore" on the Johnny Cash Show. Celebrating the massacre of anAmerican general and his cavalry regiment on a family variety show. WOW! This would take out an entire network these days.
I've noticed there is a lot of looking around the room before we speak. Sizing each other up to see if it safe to say what we really mean.
Can I talk like a Klansman circa 1958 Mississippi? Can I question gun control? Can I talk about secession? Can I question religion?
What I am seeing is a sharp rise in very noisy and indignant bigotry and a vast majority of good folks afraid to say what they think in fear of being labeled unpatriotic or even worse a Democrat.

Unpleasant phone calls.

So I'm sure we have all gotten this call:

"Hello Kristopher Robin Ludwig, this is Agent Daniels from the FBI field office in Jacksonville."
  "HaHa,pretty funny Farris."
"Sir,I assure you this is the FBI. Call me back at this number." Click.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.....
(Brrrring) "This is Agent Daniels."
"Okay okay,I can explain everything!"
"I haven't asked you anything."
"I'm taking a wild guess and bet you want to know about a phone message I left on an answering machine about material and payment and some violent subcontractors." "Yes in light of all that has happened we are following any leads."

My phone had been cloned twice that year. It got so bad I would turn it off when I got anywhere near NYC. I received an $800 phone bill in June for hundreds of calls to Bolivia and Columbia. I would get calls in the middle of the night from people yammering away in Spanish. Shit cloned again.
In August I got a call from some guy speaking Dutch. He left a voice message which I took to mean oh boy another round of fighting with Verizon. So I called the number back with the intention of giving him a good ol' profanity laded outburst. His answering machine had a robot voice speaking Dutch so I decided to give this hacker something to worry about. He cloned the wrong phone....

"Where the fuck were you? We have the material. Where the fuck is our money? You can't just not show up for a drop. These associates are not agreeable when you piss them off. Now they want an extra $10,000 or they keep the material and liquidate everyone on this side. What the fuck were you thinking? These people have no regard for anything but their cause. Tomorrow you had better show up or we're all dead." I never heard back from him.
In September...well we all know what happened on 9/11.
In early October I got the call from Agent Daniels.
"I'm so sorry for wasting your time and resources but I swear I was just trying to scare a phone hacker."
"We know. What was that voice you used, Boris Badenov?"
"Yes! I love Bullwinkle."
"Yeah, me too. I guess we are going to write this one off to really bad timing eh, Kris?"
  "So we're cool right? You don't think I'm a terrorist?"
  "We know who you are. By our records you are not dangerous."
Ay caramba, nice to know I have a dossier.